As I've mentioned above, one of the great joys of coaching both teams and individuals is that if you create a space for someone to think and use the right tools to facilitate
clearer thinking , they can work out situations and solutions which have eluded them for months or even years.
However, sometimes, the challenge for my clients isn't so much making a complex decision as in owning and acting on a decision they have already
made.
One client, a founder I worked with, told me that within six weeks of working together, he had acted on four significant decisions he had been wrestling with for over eighteen months. As a result of making and moving on those decisions, his business grew its
revenues by 30% and continued to grow. More importantly, the client told me that he had moved from a place of misery, procrastination and frustration to a space of greater agency, possibility and happiness in both his business and his wider life.
In the case of one of my
organisational clients, a world class organisation led by people in the top 1% of their sector globally, as a result of our work together, they were able to settle and act on decisions they had been batted about for years. The positive effects on the organisation have included highly improved revenue, recruitment, employee satisfaction and retention.
The secret in cases like these is not so much in helping the client make a decision but in working with them to admit to and then act upon their hidden decisions.
"Their what?"
I hear you ask! Let me explain, because, in my experience, so much of the lack of clarity, and accompanying ineffectiveness (not to mention angst), that people experience at and around work is wrapped up in hidden decisions.
When I talk
about a hidden decision, I mean a situation in which someone knows what they want to do but hides it not only from others but themselves. It is, in effect, decision denial.
I can think of one client who came to me in a very high profile, senior public role. He told me that he was at a crossroads in his career and
he could not decide whether he wanted to apply for an even bigger and more senior public role or move into a different role in the private sector, something he had never previously done. He presented this to me as a complex decision which he wanted help in making.
However,
within about ten minutes of our coaching session, as he told me what he wanted and what he had done, it became obvious to me that his problem wasn't making the decision, it was admitting to himself that he already knew what he wanted. It took a few more questions from me for him to say clearly and unambiguously for the first time what, on some level, he'd known for months.
"Wow!" He said, "It feels good just to say that out loud!"
"And, look", I replied, "The sky didn't fall in!" We then laughed and moved on to how he might then
act on his decision. He left in a far better place with a clear plan of action and, a few weeks later, he had received an offer which fulfilled all his criteria and more.
Hidden decisions can also exist in a team context where everyone has a sense of the
most effective course of action but no-one wants to say it out loud. I can think of a leadership team of a tech scale-up I worked with where pretty much every member of the team felt that the business should do a fundraise sooner than planned. However, this remained a hidden decision until a team coaching session in which I was able to help them surface it, to everyone's relief! They went on to plan and to complete a succesful fundraise which has made a huge difference to the business and
its prospects.
Whether as an individual or a team, you might want to ask, "What hidden decision am I/ we currently not admitting to and owning?" and "How is our decision denial impacting us and others?" This previous edition of "To Be Clear..." looks at the benefits of articulating the unspoken.
You might want to ask yourself what's causing you to be in denial of your decision. It might be fear of committing to one path (remember deciding is to cut off as well as to take on). It might be fear of
admitting that this is what you want or need right now in your work or business and worry about what others will think or say. It might ironically be fear of looking too decisive or not collegiate enough.*** It might be worry that, while the decision is simple, acting on it might be complex. It might be something else entirely.
Whatever it is, rest assured that admitting to and owning hidden decisions is a big step in clarity, progress and effectiveness at work. Remember, you've actually already made this decision so currently you are wasting time, energy and headspace (not to mention, acting out of integrity with yourself) by pretending you haven't. The more you persist in decision denial, the harder you are making things not just for yourself but for those around you. As a previous edition of "To Be Clear..." made clear, layering ambiguity on top of uncertainty may feel safe but helps no-one. Remember, as per the Outcome layer of ONION "Destination determines direction" and the first step to actionable clarity is getting clear on where you want to go and why.
A helpful way of surfacing hidden decisions is to work with a good business coach. A good start - and self directed alternative - is to do
some exploratory writing, just find a quite spot and five minutes, get a pen and paper, set a timer for three or five minutes and write at the top of the sheet "I want to..." or "I need to..." then just write, don't edit or overthink, just write.
In a team context,
you can get everyone to write down, "I think we should..." at the top of an individual sheet of paper, give them two minutes to write privately and then you can either gather in people's sheets anonymously or get people to read out what they wrote - start with a round without comment before discussing further.
